A camera drone followed the young lieutenant as she made her way through her personal hangar in the Tuomuta spaceport. Her face was pale with dark smudges beneath her eyes, evidence that she had barely slept the last few days. She trailed her hands through her messy red hair, attempting to pull it up into a bun. The artifical lights flickered overhead, humming softly, the only other sound besides her boots clunking against the metal grating below her. She frowned at the open space. Before it had been filled with a line of punishers, fully fitted with tech two modules, all ready for battle. Now she had two punishers left, along with a small shuttle and a scattering of cargo containers filled with crystals and few other pieces of modules for ships she did not have.
She sighed to herself as she propped up on one of the containers, looking at the empty space. Granted she had a retribution and malediction stored away in a different hangar, but she was reluctant to fly them just yet. She'd barely mastered flying the punisher and wasn't about to try her hand at something different and more expensive. Not yet, not til she was comfortable and had honed the instincts as some of the other, better pilots.
Looking around, she realized it wouldn't take much to move her stuff to Myyhera. A couple of flights and she'd be all set. Then all she'd have to do was make a trip up to Amarr to buy in bulk and have it contracted out to Vlad Konstantinov to be taken down to the warfront at once. That'd be a big help, at least.
She propped a boot up onto the opposite cargo container and sighed wearily. A thousand things were running through her mind at once. Getting her stuff moved. Worry over Zenton and his sec status. Worry over all of the people she hadn't seen in weeks now, Michael, Jhaelee, and Darius specifically. Losing Halmah. Patrols. What had happened the previous night after patrols with Mitara at the My Blue Heaven.
Without even realizing it, she started to rant outloud, needing to vent.
"That son-of-a-bitch Raephael can rot. Last night I stopped by My Blue Heaven for a nightcap. The place was pretty quiet, just Garst and Saint was there. We all ended up in a booth together, talking and drinking. He was fine at first. After a while he went off to talk to some slutty waitress, she must have shot him down because when he came back to the table he was sour and started taking his piss poor attitude out on me. I let one smartassed comment slide but then he went off. I've never been talked to like that in my life, how dare he, an ensign, verbally attack me, his superior."
"I threw my drink in his face and promptly left the bar."
"I don't know who I'm more angry with at the moment. Garst really didn't say anything to him. I expected him to punch him or something but no. Clearly, when push comes to shove he is going to side with Raephael over me. That was obvious. I just don't understand how Garst can claim to love me and yet he will sit there and let his best friend insult me like that."
"They can both go to hell."
"I'm not going back there either. I just don't see the point. So that makes two places I refuse to go now. I'm boycotting the Paradise Found since Captain Laerise made it so that Zenton was barred. But no worries, it's a big galaxy, theres tons more places to piss away my money at."
"Right now I'm just really exhausted and stressed and I don't need this. It makes me not want to be around them, off duty and on. I mean. What the fuck." She kicked at the container for emphasis. "I have went out of my way to be nice to Saint. One night he came into Saint Alms when I was there and we ended up talking, he confessed to me how he almost killed himself just because he had a bad day out on the warfront. I told him to shake it off, that everyone loses ships and everyone gets podded from time to time. Shit happens. It's how you deal with it that matters. You can sit there and whine about it and drink yourself into oblivion or you can learn from your mistakes and get back out there."
"Now I wish I would have told him to grow a new pair and stop snivelling like a two day recruit who just wet his pants."
"Mamas boy.""Really just who does he think he is! I can't let it go, not anytime soon. And I dare him or Garst to say one word to me, I'll tell them both to fuck off."
Shalee slid off of the container and started to pace the length of the hangar. "Just not in public. I refuse to let either of them put one more thing on my Praetorian record."
She could only imagine the file the directorates had on her, it probably took up half of Gaven's office.
Realizing that her ranting was only making her more annoyed, she ended the connection and forced herself to start moving her stuff out to Myyhera.