The Last Light- Part Two

Her eyes darted back and forth behind closed lids.  Her body trembled as the last memories of her previous life flashed through her mind.  She fought desperately to put all the pieces in place, to make sense of a massive information 'download' into her new clone.

She thrashed about in the clone bay hibernation unit, sloshing fluid as her fingers curled into tight fists.  She slammed them against the translucent lid of her container, beating frantically to draw someone's attention to her.

"I'm alive," the thought ran through her mind though she couldn't actually speak the words, her mouth was still melded around an artificial tube that connected to her lungs, a breathing apparatus that provided sterile, filtered air.

The dull thud of her hands smashing against the container startled Kobe Caglia, junior pod technician, assigned to Jonathan, chief pod technician- someone who had been working for Shalee since she'd become a capsuleer.

Groggily he glanced around, having fallen asleep at the station while his boss had taken a much-needed break.  The pair of them had been on duty the entire night as their employer fought her way across the Bleaklands.

Thus was the life of a pod technician.  They slept when their employer slept.  Their schedules mirrored hers so that they would be there to resurrect her should she die.

And with the Tribals putting up a relentless fight across the war zone, every Amarrian Militia capsuleer seemed to be pulling double shifts of patrols just to keep them at bay.  They barely slept, and neither did their grounded counterparts.

The Amarr were losing the war at a frightning pace.  Nerves were stretched, tempers were high, and everyone was exhausted.

Kobe hadn't meant to doze off but it had finally caught up with him.  Having been monitoring her patrol over comms, he had fallen asleep to the sound of the FC giving orders to jump and hold cloak.

He had started to dream of the fleet, of being in the midst of the battle.  He was there as the two fleets engaged, as ships exploded one by one.  He could hear the cries as thousands of crew members were blown to bits out into the unforgiving endlessness of space.  Debris surrounded the stargate, lights from it illuminated what was left of their ships.  So many pods hovered, suspended in an eerie light.

He jerked awake to the sound of 'Resurrection Imminent'.  A siren blazed, the display lit up with pale neon warning lights. 'Resurrection Imminent,' the automated warning system repeated.

"Fuck."  He dashed over to the hibernation unit and pushed the lid to the side.  He shoved one hand beneath her neck, pulling her up out of the shimmering fluids, his other hand pulled the tube from her mouth.

"Breathe," he said as he rubbed his thumb across her eyelids, wiping away the liquid that had gelled in the creases.  She blinked several times, clearing her vision, taking a few shallow breaths.

"Commodore Lianne?  You with me?" he asked in a soft voice, staring down into her confused eyes.

She nodded as he pulled her up out of the clone vat and wrapped her in a towel.  She took a few tentative steps then faltered.  He caught her, "Easy now."

"Something doesn't feel right."

"What do you mean?"

"I died," she said softly.

He nodded.  It wasn't uncommon to have confusion after awakening for the first time in a new body.  "You did."

She hesitated, "But ...something isn't right."  Memories flashed lightning fast through her mind.

"Tell me."

"I don't know."  Her brows furrowed as she tried to remember, "I can't remember."

"Maybe it will come to you later.  Here, let me help you Commodore."  He led her off to the showers so that she could get cleaned up.  After she went through a quick medical exam, she was released.

Wearing a drab medical jumpsuit, she entered into the medical station's cafeteria, in no hurry to make her way back to her captain's quarters.  She filled a tray and headed over to sit by the windows.  As soon as she took her seat, Scorpion Venom neared her table, "This chair taken?"

She nodded, as if to say sit down.  "So they got you too?"

"Yeah."  He sat down in front of her, his tray as full as hers, "Fucking bastards."

She studied his face, recognizing him after a moment. "Scorpion, right?"

"At your service."  He popped the lid off a bottle of water and took a long drink from it.

"This is the first time we've met?  Out of pod, I mean," she asked.  She leaned back in her chair and twisted her damp hair into a bun.

"Yeah, I think so."  He gave her a glance in between bites.  "Do you..." he seemed to hesitate.

"Do I remember how we died?" she prompted.

He nodded.  "Yeah.  One minute we were fighting and the next..."

She finished his sentence, "Everything was dark.  The pod wouldn't warp, it should have still been online.  But it wasn't, it was just dark and cold and no one could hear.  I could see outside, I could see there were others just sitting there..."  she whispered, remembering the last few moments of her last death.

His dark eyes bore down on here, lost in the memory, "And then suddenly there was so much light.  Like a blinding light and I couldn't get my pod out.  It should have responded, but it didn't. The light was from outside...and then it felt like it was being pulled by tractor beams?"

She nodded again, "Yes!  It makes no sense, right?  It couldn't have happened like that...it's impossible...you can't lock onto pods with tractor beams and that light..."  Her voice dropped to a mere whisper, "And then we were pulled into a loading bay and broken out of our pods, and that's when we died.  After the pods were split open manually."

"Right."  The stared at each other for a long moment.

"Well fuck."

She glanced down at her food tray, "Maybe it was just some...glitch... in the download."  She knew that it was very unlikely that they both experienced the same exact 'glitch' but there was no other way to explain it.

"Yeah.  A glitch," he said unconvincingly.

They both fell silent.

***
A stream of pale green lights glowed along the top of the dark corridor, simulating night in the 'second station' of Egghelende, a Gallente station that the Imperial Outlaws had claimed as their home for the last couple of months.  "Deck forty-seven," the automated voice announced as the doors slid open.

She exited the elevator and turned right, making her way towards her rented apartment.  One side of the corridor was transparent, giving a panoramic view of space, the other side was lined with doors that lead to I.LAW and TMFED captain's quarters.

Her thoughts lingered on the night's battles.  The Amarrian Militia had dominated the field hour after hour.  The Minmatar melted beneath their lasers, their missiles, their heavy artillery fire. The fleet had begun small, commanded by Almity and by the end of the night they had killed over four billion ISK worth of ships.

'Not a bad night at all', she thought as she neared her door, still high off the thrill of combat.  The apartment door next to hers, recently vacated by Jones Bones who had left corp to return to the Heretics, slid open.  A tallish man with blonde hair and startling blue eyes stepped out.

She gave pause, looking at him with curiosity.  "I thought those quarters were empty..." she said skeptically.

"Not anymore."

Shalee frowned, "They have been retained for the Imperial Outlaws, there must be a mistake."

"But I am an Imperial Outlaw," he smirked.

She mentally ran through a list of new recruits, they had been flooded with them over the last week or so, but he didn't match any of them.  "No you're not."

He nodded his head towards the corridor, "Take a walk with me?" He gave her a rather charming smile.

"Uh, no?"  Was he hitting on her?  She tilted her head, staring him down.  The nerve of some people, she thought irritability.  "Tell me what you are doing here."

He smirked again, "C'mon.  Take a walk and I will explain.  I promised you I would."

Her brow arched, "What?  You're making no sense.  I'm not going on a walk with you okay?  I don't even know you.  Tomorrow I will contact the station manager and get this sorted but right now I'm just going to go to bed, so if you will please excuse me."  She laid her hand against the palm scanner by her door.

"C'mon.  Take a walk.  What's it going to hurt?"  He continued to smile at her but something in his eyes pleaded with her.  "Please?"

She shook her head, growing alarmed at his insistence. "No, I'm tired and I  just..." her hand wrapped around the hilt of her sidearm as he closed the distance between them.

He was inches from her when he whispered, "Do not open that door."

Fear slithered through her, "Get away from me!"  She shoved him as she pulled the sidearm from its holster, her other hand taping in the security code.  The door slid open.

"Goddamnit you're hardheaded," he said as he followed her in, shoving her out of the way as he pulled his own sidearm, shooting it at point-blank range, downing one of the would-be assailants.  The other came at him, attempting to knock the sidearm from his grasp.

He grabbed the man by the wrist and jerked him forward, twisting his arm so that it bent, in which he used the leverage to turn the man around and force him down onto his knees.  "This is the best the Covenant can send?"  He placed the barrel of his sidearm against the man's temple and pulled the trigger.  The second assailant fell forward, dead.

Shalee stared at the two dead men then looked in horror at the one left standing.

"I told you not to open that door, next time could you listen?" He disappeared through her bedroom door and returned a minute later, carrying a handful of sheets.  He started to wrap the bodies up while all she could do was stand there, trembling.

When he was nearly done, she finally seemed to get ahold of herself, "Wha-what just happened?"  she stuttered out the question.

He stood at the sink, washing his bloodied hands, "I just saved your stubborn-assed life is 'what just happened'.  I said walk goddammit, why couldn't you just take a walk?" he sounded as if he were annoyed with her.

"I don't even know you!  I'm not going to take a walk with someone I don't even know!"

"You do know me.  Sort of.  I'm Melisandre.  Also, Scatha and a couple of other identities."

She stared at him blankly, as if still in shock.  "What?"

"Look, we don't have time for all the details right now.  What we are going to do is drag these two over to my apartment and lock it up then go for that walk that you should have taken.  We need to hurry because there are a few more raiders who will be checking up on these two any minute.  Got it?"

She gave a curt nod and helped him drag the bodies next door.  Once they were in the corridors, he shook his head, 'Not that way, this way."  He led her down to a service elevator and once they were inside, he seemed to relax.  "She listens for once."

"So are you going to tell me how you're not a girl?" she asked, watching the deck numbers flicker as the elevator descended.

He shook his head, his lips curled into a slight smile.  "Really?  That's your first question after everything that just happened?"

"It seems relevant."

"They are just a couple of identities, it keeps the DED off my back."

She gave him a look of disbelief.  It wasn't a simple act to just create a whole new identity for yourself, not with the DED involved- a police force and paramilitary of Concord.  They kept tight records on who was a capsuleer.  A pod-pilot simply didn't just buy a new identity, it was nearly impossible, or so she thought.

He noted her look.  "Anything can be bought for a price, haven't you learned that by now.  You can't be that naive."

She rolled her eyes, "Whatever, okay.  Let's say I'm buying this.  What's your real name?"

"Steve.  You can call me Steve."

"Fine, Steve. And now that we know who you are.  I want to know what you are.  You're obviously not just some random capsuleer.  You fought like ...some sort of assassin."

"Bingo."

The Last Light, Part One

Consciousness came slowly, a trickling of awareness that broke through the black smothering fog within her mind. A sliver of red light caught her attention and desperately she clung to it, focused on it as she forced herself to mentally fight her way out of the dark.

With awareness came pain, so much goddamned pain that it was tempting to let herself fall back into the sea of darkness once more, to pass out and eventually die.

No.

Sheer determination kept her eyes half parted.

Seconds turned into minutes as she hung there, forcing herself to stay focused on nothing but the red pulsing light, forcing her terror down into something more manageable. Her pounding heart slowed as she fought her way through the panic, the terror.

Breathe, just breathe.

She gathered her courage and forced her eyes open all the way, darting them from side to side. The room was long, cold, and filled with several bodies suspended from the ceiling like her, their wrists bound together above their heads, ankles shackled to the floor. All were clothed in the remnants of their pod suits, a thin material that capsuleers wore while piloting spacecraft. Most of them were unconscious, drugged so that they would offer no resistance when it was time to bleed them.
Her stomach lurched at the thought. Bleeding. She was about to be hooked up to some ungodly device and slowly drained of her blood until nothing remained but a dry corpse. She would die a slow agonizing death aboard this Blood Raider vessel, her blood a sacrifice to the disgusting 'religious' zealots who raided the Bleaklands, ghoulish twisted individuals who wore white animalistic masks and long robes. They preyed upon starships in search of the prized 'red', blood of the cloned.

She whimpered as she heard steps across the metal grating floor. They were coming. One stopped in front of her. He wore the white mask of the Raiders, tho parts of him were visible beyond it. His glossy dark eyes, thin lips. He was taller than her. His white robes were already stained with blood. She looked at the floor.

"Commodore Lianne, a pleasure to have you here." His tone was practically jovial.

"Fuck you."

"Are you really in a position to take such an attitude?" he laughed as he grabbed her by the chin, squeezing her face. "Look at me when I talk to you."

She lifted her blue gaze to his masked face and spit. She never was one to follow the rules and what did it matter now? She knew she was hours away from death regardless of her behavior.

"Fiesty. I bet your blood is spicy," he said as his split-tongue darted between the mouth-hole of his mask and licked at her cheek. "Maybe I'll have a little taste now hmmm?" He pricked her chin then suckled the droplets of blood away.

She struggled to no avail. With her wrists bound above her head and her ankles cuffed to the floor below, there was little she could do. "What's your name?" she whispered.

"Faliin Oreen," he replied as he pulled back, his dark eyes glistened beneath the mask, "Why do you want to know?" He sounded a bit startled, as if no one had ever asked him before. His masked head tilted, his eerie gaze bore down on her.

"Because I want to know who I'm coming for, Faliin Oreen. I want to know the name of the man I'm going to kill."

His body shook with laughter. "You're not going to remember this. You're a capusleer. Your last memory will be from the time you were taken from your pod. You wont remember how you were captured or how you died."

"How did you do it anyhow? How did you manage to abduct this many capsuleers at once?"

He smiled beneath the mask showing off blood-stained teeth. "You really want to know?" he asked, considering telling her. And why not?, he thought. She was marked for death and even as she awakes in a new clone tucked far away in Empire space, she wouldn't have these memories.

None of them would.

"Tell me."

"A couple of hours ago, we were there, cloaked, watching, knowing that one of your numerous battles were about to go down. You militia 'soldiers' are so predictable. And so we waited until the thick of the battle was over and as you lost your ships one by one, we simply stole your pods right out of the sky."

"Impossible. There is no way you could have taken this many capsuleers alive." Sure, they could have collected corpses after the battle but how did they manage to collect intact pods? How did so many not warp out?

"Jovian mechanics. A nice little mod that deploys a pulse of neutralizing energy within a 20KM radius. It shut down your pod's ability to warp- all of your pods." He swept his hand around motioning to the others. "It shuts everything down completely, matter of fact, so that you couldn't even send a distress signal. It was like you exploded but left behind no corpse. Whoever comes looking for your wrecks will assume you all died in the explosions. And somewhere in New Eden, another version of you is waking up in a clone vat, the last memory she will have is dying in a battle in the Bleaklands."

"You bastard."

"Your anger makes it that much more delicious." He pierced her skin with a metallic rod, "Scream for me. I want your blood to boil." Blood oozed around the open wound as he injected it deeper, thrusting it harshly beneath her skin. His serpent tongue wiggled around the rod, licking away any blood that escaped.

She bit down on her lip so hard it bled, but she would not give him the satisfaction of screaming.

Pain radiated in hot, nauseating waves. She felt sick. The contents of her stomach spewed across his blood-splattered robes. "Fucking bitch." He backhanded her, stinging her face though the pain was brief compared to the draining device protruding into her arm. He shoved the rod ruthlessly and she could see it bubble beneath her skin.

"You'll scream before it's over," he promised as he added a second device to her other arm. "I'll be back for you." They retreated, leaving her alone in the room with the other half-dead corpses. She could hear the doors sealing air tight, followed by the sounds of overhead vents pulling back, allowing the air to be perfumed by some sort of toxin, she presumed. She tried to hold her breath but knew it was pointless.

Tears rolled silently down her cheeks, her head dropped to the side, pressed against her upheld arm. She could feel her life fading away and she tried to fight it. "I don't want to die I don't want to die," she whispered to herself over and over. "I don't want to die like this," she said mindlessly.

"What the fuck..." someone screamed as his eyes shot open, his face twisted with terror. He jerked at the chains above his head, "What's going on, what's happening?"

Shalee rolled her head slightly to see who was screaming. "You're dead."

"The hell I am! Where the fuck are we?!" he demanded.

"Abducted."

"Sansha?"

"Bloodraiders."

"How the fuck did that happen? I was just fighting and then suddenly I couldn't warp out..." his voice quieted as he noticed the tubes wrapped around his arms, his blood dripping slowly out into a container beside him.

"Like I said, we are already dead."

He peered at her through the semi-darkness as he coughed, "Shalee?"

"Yeah. Scorp?" she whispered, feeling light-headed. She recognized Scorpion Venom though she'd never seen him out of pod. He was a new inty pilot in the Amarr militia. She'd been in countless fleets with him by this point and knew that if anyone should have gotten off field, it should have been. Fucking Bloodraiders. Godamned Jovians.

"Yeah. Where are...I mean. How? How did we even get here?"

"They came in as we exploded and had some goddamned Jovian device to suspend our pods, we couldn't warp out. The pods must have sent a signal back to the meds saying we are dead- I think we are already resurrected and no one even knows we are here."

"Fuck. So we are going to die right?" He jerked at the chains again.

"Yeah."

"Goddamnit."

"Yeah."

"What are they going to do with us?"

"Bleed us. They will drain every drop of blood from our bodies until we are completely dry." She sniffled as a few more tears streaked her cheeks. "It's all they care about. Clone blood."

He nudged his head at the tubes inserted into his arms, trying to push them out. He tensed, the movement causing blood to pour out beyond the tube, streaking his arm with dark red liquid.

"Might as well stop that, you're just going to make them come back," she whispered. "The worst part is over, all we have to do now is die."

Emotions flooded his face as his dark eyes filled with unshed tears. "So this is how we die?"

"We die all the time, don't we?"

"Yeah but not like this, not like some goddamned cocktail ingredient," he said weakly.

"It wont be long now," she whispered as her eyes closed, her lashes fluttering against her cheeks as she tried to fight to keep them open, to stay alert. "Talk to me, tell me something. Keep talking." she pleaded. "I don't want to die alone."

She sniffled, waiting for him to speak, to say anything. "Scorp?" It took every bit of her strength to glance in his direction, "Please..." But he was already dead.
"You're not alone." Another voice said nearby, one that she did not recognize. She forced herself to turn in the chains, her body swung to face him. He was tall, dark blonde hair, and had the bluest eyes she'd ever seen. They almost glowed. She stared blankly at him.

"I don't know you."

"You do."

She blinked several times, fighting back the inevitable, "I don't," she protested. "What's your name?"

"I'll tell you when we are out of this place."

"How? You wont remember this. We wont remember any of it...it will be like it never happened." Through the vents they could hear the sounds of several people screaming at once.

"I'll remember, okay? I'll remember and I will tell you."

More screams added to the hellish sounds, "Oh god, they are torturing them." She closed her eyes for a brief moment, "God let me die before they come back."

"Look at me."

She blinked her eyes open and stared at him, "The worst is over," He said. "Take deep breaths, deep as you can. It will pull in more of the poison into your system. Breathe with me." He gulped in as much air as he could. "Do it!" he said as he exhaled.

Barely nodding, she whispered, "Okay." She forced the strange, fragrant air into her lungs.

"Breathe," he said again, once more swallowing as much air as he could, "Breathe." She focused on nothing but the sound of his voice, breathing deeply upon his commands.

The air seemed to get lighter, the sounds of the screaming faded, or maybe she just couldn't hear it anymore. The red light seemed to grow, filling her vision. Everything was a blur.

She forced herself to look at him one final time. His eyes were bright, as if lit by something within. An eye piece? No. She must be hallucinating, she thought. Something was wrong with his eyes, they weren't human, and something silver, the color of bright metal, was dripping down his cheeks from the corners of his eyes. It crawled down his face and fell to the floor, reshaping into a pool of silver before dripping through the grated floor.

She couldn't muster the strength to ask him about it. She inhaled her final breath and exhaled, dying to the sound of his last command, "Just let go..."

Entry 149: The Horrible Things We Have Done

"What do you dream of?"

She stared at the ceiling, watching the blades of an overhead fan bleed together as the cool air fluttered wispy strands of hair about her face.  She brushed them away as she spoke, "Sometimes I dream of being a child, of when my Mother was alive.  And sometimes I dream of flying, of battles that I've been in."

"I believe it is your memories trying to sort themselves while you sleep."

"Probably...but sometimes it's still hard to figure out what's real and what's not."

"Tell me what's real about the last five months."

"What do you want to know?"

"Tell me about your corporation."

"We were deployed to Otosella for a while and then called back to the war zone.  We currently reside in Egghelende but were stationed in Arzad for a brief time."

"And the people you work with?  Tell me about them."

She furrowed her brows as she considered his question.  "There's a lot of them.  I guess I'll start with Eran. He is still a part of the corporation though for a while he wasn't.  They even said he was dead but we had a copy of his clone that no one knew about.  A precaution after what happened with me.  So we were able to bring him back without knowing who or what was responsible for it.  But he's different now."

"Different how?"

"Withdrawn.  It's as if he doesn't know what to say to me any longer.  We fly together but I never see him otherwise."

He nodded, "And the others?"

"There's Ryven.  He just got married to Leela- it was out of the blue.  At least to me.  But he seems happy, that's all that matters.  And I do like her.  Phione, well, he's sort of a guardian angel to us all.  I don't spend much time planet side with him but I trust him ."

She hesitated before continuing, "Almity..." She chewed the inside of her cheek, hesitating again.  She darted her blue gaze to the doctor.  "I feel like I'm betraying her trust by speaking of this."

"Anything you say here is confidential, you know that.  All I'm trying to do is help you, Commodore Lianne."

She nodded, "Almity is loyal to the Empire, I do not doubt that at all.  She's just...she has her own way of showing her loyalty.  Some do it on the battlefield, and some step outside the realms of militia and space combat. I know that she's killed Minmatar out of pod. Contract work.  It's as if she's some sort of thrill seeker...as if she enjoys it."

The doctor nodded, "That's not so uncommon for a capsuleer."

"I know.  She confided to me about her 'sidework' and then offered to introduce me to the one who provides her the contracts."

"Did you meet with him?"

"Yes.  I had to.  I had to know exactly what Almity was up to, who she associated with...how far she would go."

"What has she done?"

"Murder."

"Not so uncommon for a capusleer..." he repeated.

"Killing in space is vastly different than killing with your own two hands."

"How so?"

"I don't know, it just seems so...personnel."

"Did you take a contract?"

"Yes."

"What happened?"

"I met a man who supplied the Minmatar.  Being a merchant wasn't reason enough alone to kill him.  I investigated him a bit...he was a bad man...and well, he deserved to die."

"Have there been other contracts?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because I prefer to use lasers and missiles not silver-tipped blades."

"Tell me more.  About the others. The more you speak of them, the more you will remember, it will reinforce those memories and override any confusion you may be having.  Tell me about the people you trust."

She shifted uncomfortably on the sofa, "Kato Aivoras.  He's fearless on the battlefield.  Wylona is too, though I didn't know either of them before the accident, I think.  Look, I don't know how this is going to help me, talking about work."

"Fine.  We will save it for later.  Let's talk about your personal life.  Are you still engaged?"

"Yes.  Very much so."

"And when will you marry him?"

"I don't know.  It's hard to have a relationship with someone who is half across New Eden most of the time. We see each other when we can but it's difficult."

"Have you asked him to join you?"

"I cannot ask that of him.  He has his own life, his own responsibilities to his corporation."

"Then join him."

"I will not leave the Empire, he knows that.  Maybe after the war.  Though...I don't know.  There are certain things that are not resolved."

"Such as?"

"There are still two months of memories unaccounted for- the two where I got involved with Tiger.  And I don't know why I did it.  I don't know if my feelings were genuine for him at the time or if I had an ulterior motive."

"Can that possibly matter now, over a year later?"

"Yes, if he was some sort of contract, if I was using him for whatever reason...if I was trying to destroy him, then he deserves to know, perhaps.  How can he love me if I wanted to hurt him?"

"If it were so, do you think he would be able to forgive you?"

"I don't know.  Perhaps. He loves me desperately but at the same time, I know what he is capable of, I know how truly dark he can be...how evil he has been.  I am afraid of turning him back to that, to that man he once was, when he was a part of the Sani Sabik."

"He has renounced his faith, hasn't he?  Before you two got involved?"

"I believe so...but I think if we were to part he would find comfort with them again.  And surely Revan would delight in having her control over him once more."

"I believe it would be best to be as truthful with him as possible, despite the consequences.  Otherwise you're living a false life and that will not help you clear up your memory issues."

She laughed, the irony not lost on her, "I've been living a false life my whole life.  But you're right.  I should probably tell him everything.  Tell him I might have become involved with him to murder him and every one of his clones.  And while I'm at it I might as well make confessions about Zenton."

"What would you confess?"

"That I...once..." she exhaled a soft breath while rubbing her hands across her face, "That I saw Zenton...slept with him, I mean.  Before I ever knew Tiger, he can't be angry about that.  Zenton and I have a past, but no one knows what happened...no one knows that we weren't careful and I became pregnant.  Zenton didn't even know.  Once I found out, I cloned jumped...I just needed time to sort it all out in my mind.  And then he joined the Minmatar and I couldn't dare tell him."

"And what happened to the child?"

"She's safe, far away from the war zone, a place where no one can find her to use against us.  She will never know about us, her true parents, or the things we have done...the horrible things we have done to one another in the name of duty and war."

Entry 148: Remembering

Four Months Ago...

"How's she looking?"  Ethan Verone asked.

Dr Einmoch nodded approvingly as he looked over data on the holo displays, checking it off against old data from her last visit, "She appears to be perfectly healthy. She'll rouse herself in her own time."

Shalee whimpered a soft little sound as she started to awaken, her eyelids remained closed though her eyes darted back and forth.

Dr Einmoch monitored her closely, checking her vitals off while keeping his eyes on her.

Suddenly she blinked her eyes open, first looking at Dr Einmoch, then to Verone.

"Ah good, you're with us, and awake," the doctor said.  "Please keep your head down, give yourself a few minutes to gather your senses."

Verone smiled slightly to her and nodded.

She lifted a hand and rubbed it against her forehead. "Alright," she said rather softly, as if uncertain.

Verone tilted his head and watched her carefully as Dr Einmoch smiled, chuckling,  "Okay, I need to ask you a few basic questions, Shalee, alright?"

Shalee furrowed her brows at Verone as he watched her, a look of confusion flashed across her face, followed by a look of distress. She pulled her hand from her forehead, holding both hands in front of her,

"What...happened?" She searched for the scars.

Verone stood quietly and smiled to her, "It's alright, don't worry, you're safe and well. Just relax and work with the doc, okay?"

Dr Einmoch watched her carefully, "Shalee?"

She looked back to the doctor and nodded, as if to say go ahead.

"Your full name?"

"Shalee Lianne Cerra."

"Your current employer?"

"The Knight-" she hesitated. "No, that isn't right." She shook her head as if confused. "Am I crazy?" she looked to Verone, "Everything seems jumbled up....the Outlaws."

"No, you're not crazy." Verone said.

"It'll take an hour or so to slip into place," Einmoch said.  "Do you remember our coversation last night?"

"But it...feels like a dream. Like it didn't really happen..." She looked to Verone again, "Is Drem alright?"

"Drem? We'll talk about that later. How are you feeling?"

"Lightheaded."

Einmoch smiled to her, "Do you remember where you were born?"

"Adia."

"Your birthday, and age?" he questioned.

Shalee named off her birthday and the year she was born. "Twenty two."

"Good, excellent."

"Do you remember your previous employer, his name, and the name of the corporation?"

She answered softly. "Aldrith Shutaq. Knighthood of the Merciful Crown."

"Your new corporation, and their CEO?"

"Eran. Outlaws." She shook her head, "But it doesn't really seem real." She looked to Verone again, "Is Drem okay?  Can I see him?"

"Right now it's important that you recover, you can speak to people when you're feeling one hundred percent."

"I agree with Ethan," Einmoch said.  "Try to relax. Can you lift your right hand for me?"

"But there was so much blood," she said as she lifted her right hand.

"That was a long time ago, things are much different now," Verone said.

"It feels like it just happened."

"Can you tell me the current Date, Shalee?" the doctor asked.

She opened her mouth to say the date she was cloned at the facility then paused, remembering that months had passed since. She named the current date.

Dr Einmoch nodded, "Now a little motor test. Touch the tip of each finger to your thumb on your right hand for me."

She complied, daintly tapping her fingertips against her thumbs, "Like this?"

"And now the other hand, please."

Shalee touched each fingertip to the opposite thumb. "Is this necessary? I feel fine." She moved to sit up in the bed.

"Motor tests are part of the process yes. How do you feel, sat up? Any diziness?" he asked.

"Fine.  I feel fine." She blinked several times as everything started to swirl. "Yes."

He gently rested his palm on her forehead, adjusting various dials on her monitoring equipment,  "Stay layed down for now."

She laid back against the pillow as instructed. "He died, didn't he." She rolls her head to the side, looking at Verone. "That's what you're not telling me."

"Yeah, he did, but not from what happened with you." Verone said.

"Try to relax, Shalee," Einmoch said softly.

She nodded, trying to relax. "He was sweet." She looked upset suddenly. "He used to..." She gasped as a thought occured to her. "Did you kill him?"

"No, I didn't.  He was a good friend." Verone said, shaking his head.

"You know what he did?" she asked, her expression worried.

Dr Einmoch interrupted them, "This isn't the time for these types of discussion, focus on remembering more distant things."

Verone looked at her, "I know everything, yes. He told me everything."

Shalee shook her head as if everything is still jumbled up, "Everything is strange." She stared up at the ceiling. "I thought it was you."

"You thought what was me?" Verone asked.

"Him. When he came around as Niques."

"No, that wasn't me.  But I do know what happened."

She fell silent, saying nothing.

"Tell me what else you remember?"

"Everything, I think."

Verone nodded and smiled, "Good. That's what you wanted, wasn't it?"

She nodded very slightly. "But things aren't linear...it's a bit...jumbled."

"In the space of a few hours, it will reorder itself.  You should rest. I'd like you to stay here for 24 hours."

She nodded again, "Alright." She searched her memories as they flashed through her mind as if she were watching a holovid on fastforward.

Dr Einmoch nodded to her and smiled, ushering the two cloning techs out, then giving a final check over of her equipment, "You'll find all the entertainment you need for twenty-four hours in the holo-projector. I'll be back to check on you periodically, if you need anything, the staff here will be here non-stop."

"Alright. Thank you."

The doctor nodded to her then departed, leaving her with Ethan.

Verone nodded to Toma as he left and then pulled up a stool to sit beside her bed, watching her quietly.

"You wanted me to remember that it was you who helped me," she said.

"No.  I just didn't trust anyone other than Toma to do it.  If you hate me, then that's your choice. I can't change it."

"I don't hate you."

"Then that's your choice...how are you feeling now?"

"Just a little...unnerved, or something."

"Why's that?"

She shook her head, "I don't know."

"I'm sure you'll feel better after some sleep."

"Yeah, I guess. Hopefully."

He smiled to her as he stood, "Anything I can get you?"

"No I guess I'll be alright. You don't have to stay. I know you're busy."

"I'm fine, I have the night off."

"So you're going to nurse me back to health huh?"

He smirked, "Yeah, that's the Shalee I remember."

She laughed a soft little sound. "Can I have some water?" She attemped to sit up again, too fidgety to be laying around.

Verone nodded and headed to the side of the room, filling her a large lidded pitcher with ice cool water and a glass too. As he went to stand, he battered his head on the overhead cabinets, ducking and smirking before heading over to her. He offered her the glass, then rested the pitcher down beside her bed.

She giggled. "Did you forget how tall you are?"

"It happens."

Verone smirked and headed back over to the cabinets, dabbing at the back of his head with some gauze.  It stains with crimson as he walks back to her, "I've got probably more of a headache than you, now."

She frowned, "You're bleeding." She attempted to slide her legs over the bedside. Her feet touched the cool floor. "Let me help you."

"It's fine, lie down.  It happens all the damn time,"  He gently slipped his hand under her legs and lifted them back onto the bed, "Rest. You shouldn't be wandering about yet.  Doc's orders, not mine."

"But I don't want to stay in bed all night I feel like I've had tons of sleep."

"Your medication will kick in in an hour or so, and knock you out until morning, so that the memories can have a good chance to take."

She pouted, "So I just have to lay here bored?" With a sigh she stretched a hand out for the water he brought her.

"Yup, and get your head together."

"Boring." She scrunched up her brows as memories melded, playing in the back of her mind. Her face lit up, "I can fly a falcon now.  I just remembered."

Verone chuckled.

"I thought Miko would have been here."

"He was going to be. He got shot this afternoon, while on contract.  He's alright, recouping in the medical wing."

"It's dangerous to be around you."

"He wasn't on contract for me, but we take care of his medical needs.  He has the same problem as me, with his size. Toma is well versed in dealing with it."

"Oh."

"He wanted to be here.  Did you want him here?"

She shook her head no, "I guess not."

"Then why ask about him?"

"I don't know. Because you're not talking much.  And I have this nervous habit of rambling, I guess."

"I figured... I'd maybe have more to say, But i'm lost for words.  Why are you nervous?"

"Because it's you."

"Why do I make you nervous?"

Memories jumbled one on top of the other. A myriad of scenes flashed through her mind but not in order,  "I don't know. You just do."

"If I wanted to hurt you, I'd have done it before now. And I'd have left you a confused muddle, with no memories," he said.

"I know."

"Then relax.  And if you wanna talk to Miko, I'll send him up in the morning sometime."

"No it's fine, I'm sure Ill run into him sometime or other."

He shrugged and smiled at her, "You got about thirty minutes before you get knocked out for the night... I suggest you rest up, and I'll come see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Alright."

He smiled a little,  "If you remember anything, write it down in the holo interface and mail it to me, and we'll talk tomorrow and square your head away, okay?"

Shalee nodded as she sat her glass onto the table beside her bed. "Alright. I'll do that...." her brows scrunched together, "Are you looking for me to remember something specific?"

Verone shook his head and smiled,  "Nah, just anything in general you have queries about or whatever.  Rest up, we'll speak tomorrow, and if you need anything, the staff are here."

She nodded.

He headed to the door and tossed the gauze from the back of his head in the trash can beside it, "Sleep well."

He gave a brief glance back at her before leaving the room.

Blog Banter 33: I Heart Newbies Too

Blog Banter 33: The Capsuleer Experience

Like mana from Valhalla (yes I know I'm mixing my religious metaphors), the latest Dev Blog by CCP Legion asks questions which make for perfect Blog Bantering. To quote him "...we want to make the first days, weeks and months in EVE enjoyable and not just something ‘you have to plough through in order to get to the good stuff’" and the newly formed Player Experience team will focus on "...where and why people lose interest in EVE...".

"We invite you to pour your heart (or guts) out and tell us what you think is good or bad with the current new player experience and what you think could be done about the problems."

So let's get self-eviscerating. Banter on. 

Great topic!

Just yesterday I was chatting with a friend about EvE.  He had tried it several years ago but couldn't get into it, and naturally I had to poke and prod him to find out why.

Basically, he is your typical gamer who wants to have fun with the game shortly after purchasing it.

Not 'three months from now'.

That is the biggest problem with keeping new players interested in the game.

Gamers have a short attention span and they want instant gratification, they don't want to buy this 'great spaceship game', download it, spend hours upon hours learning the basics just to go shoot little red x's out in a mission, over and over and over.

Most new players never really understand the depth and potential of EvE and so they give up before they truly delve into everything the game has to offer.

My suggestions:

Give new players better resources.

The other day, I was doing some market on my alt who is in an NPC corp and I was watching corp chat while doing my work.  I notice a new guy who really has no idea what is going on.  Hoping that on the off chance the guy isn't a troll or spy, I convo him and ask if he wants to go out and pvp with my corp.  I get him on comms, give him our system and he flies out.  He is in a frig, we help him fit it best we can.  One of my corpies takes him over to a system that sells skill books and hooks him up.  He goes out on a roam with us and shoots at some flashy pirates.

Thats a best case scenario for new players who want to try pvp.

Unless you have someone there holding your hand when you start EVE, you really dont have a clue whats going on.  There is a lot of information out there but you really dont know where to find it when you first start.  There are some nice people out there who will help you but its hard to find find those people amongst the scammers and trolls.

There needs to be a better way to get the right information to the new players.

I love the idea of EvE University and I would have probably joined it had I known about it when I first started.  Corps like that should be advertised to new players.  In fact, it would be a good idea to have some kind of recruitment board just for new players that is policed by CCP- meaning don't let the scammers/trolls/griefers have access to our new players until they get their feet wet.  (I know we have a recruitment channel but from what I understand of it, it mostly sucks)

Aka, have a page with the top five noob friendly, trusted corps among various things you can do in EVE.  It could be something like top 5 industrial corps, top 5 wormhole corps, top 5 militia corps, etc.

This way the new player would have an idea of where they should first apply.


Give new players better skills and ships to start with.

I think a new player should start with more than one ship.  There should be at least three or four that do different things.  Lets have a mining frigate, a pve ship, a pvp ship, and maybe something e-war.

Give them very basic skills to do very basic things.

It really sucks to try to recruit friends into EVE and once they do get on the game, tell them 'okay we have your training que set up, you can come fly with me in a week!"

Thats fucked.

I think a new person should at least be able to start with a frig that can tackle without having to train up skills.  That should be a given.

Also in their hangar they should start with a few other things like a few skill books and some ammo.

Newbie Locations!

I think there should be a couple of noobie star systems on lockdown that allow only the new noobie pvp ships.  They should be able to go into these star systems and fight other noobs.

I think it would be great fun for a new player starting out to get a taste of pvp without the stress of losing your ship and having to find a way to replace it.

Allow only specific noob ships in the systems so they cannot be griefed.  Allow noob ships to respawn in the stations in the system.  Have several different types of ship (prefitted) for the player to choose from.  Let them go out and blow these ships up with abandon.

You could have people older players volunteer to lead mini fleets and give pvp advice maybe.

It could be like pvp bootcamp.

Players would get a taste of what EVE can be like, and it would excite them to go out there and try fleeting and fighting for real.

You can't just tell new players what EVE can be like for them months down the road, you need to show them as soon as possible.  You need to let them experience it right from the begining.

Find more responses here.

• Blog Banter: The Capsuleer Experience by Gilbert Hamilton @ Diary of a Garbageman
• Improved Mini - BWAHAHAHAH Just Kidding PvP Tutorial by Corelin @Haberdashers Run Amok 
• Blog Banter 33 - NPE by Lockefox @ Hell's Librarians
• The First Five Minutes by Marc Scaurus @ MALEFACTOR

Blog Banter 32- I heart carebears

"A quick view of the Eve Online forums can always find someone complaining about being suicide ganked, whining about some scam they fell for or other such tears. With the Goons' Ice Interdiction claiming a vast amount of mining ships, there were calls for an "opt out of PvP" option.

Should this happen? Should people be able to opt-out of PvP in Eve Online. Should CONCORD prevent crime rather than just handing out justice after the event? Or do the hi-sec population already have too much protection from the scum and villainy that inhabits the game?"

****

By their own rules, or lack of, EvE Online allows their members to steal from, destroy, slander, harass, and abuse other members.

It's not merely tolerated, it is celebrated.

On any given day across New Eden's five thousand plus star systems, you will find an array of pilots trolling other pilots in local channels.  You will find fresh-eyed newbies being scammed out of whatever ISK they manage to make for themselves and if they happen to venture too far out, you will find these same new players being blown up over and over and over.

You will also find some random miners being suicide ganked and high sec industrial corps getting wardecced and slaughtered.

Etc, etc.

EvE is a harsh game.  It is a brutal game.

But in the end, it is a game.  It isn't real and you weren't really there.

At best, you were some smuck sitting at your keyboard pretending to be Lord of the Skies while pressing F1.

I think too many players forget that, that it's just a game.  Games need to make money to survive, to thrive.  Games need to appeal to a wide demographic, not just a sliver of humanity- those who are psychotic, evil, and ruthless.

Because really, why does anyone need to have the ability to kill wtfpwn everyone in the game?

'But Shalee, these noobs need to HTFU!'

Er, why?  Why do they really need to be harassed?  Do you feel better about yourself?  Do you really feel accomplished when you kill a noob pilot? Really?  How does that relate to real life?  'Hey Mom, I just owned some NoobLord and told him I'd stick my dick up his ass and rape him again haha!'  Good boy.

'But Shalee, EvE is dark!  EvE is like reality!"

Uh, no.  EvE isn't reality.  Reality is reality.  EvE is still a game.  And again, games need money.  Where does the money come from?  Ah yes, those bright eyed bushy tailed noobs that everyone is harassing out of game.  Remember that 20% of CCP employees that got fired not too long ago?  Guess who could be paying their salary right now!  Guess what those fired CCP employees could be doing right now!  That's right.  Fixing our game.

Yes, I agree, EVE is a sandbox but that doesn't necessarily have to be it's selling point.  When most people decide to play EVE, I'm sure the majority came to the game to fly spaceships."

I came to EVE cause I wanted to be this:

or this:

I think it's that simple. I don't think anyone was sitting around one day thinking, 'mmm, I need an mmo that I can lie, harass, and grief newbies."

Don't get me wrong, I love pvp, and I would be utterly bored without it.  It makes the game interesting for me, but I can understand that some people simply don't have the time or desire for it.  Should they be forced into it anyhow?  I don't think so.  I don't really see the point in forcing one style of gameplay onto the entirety of EVE.

Why can't new players and industrials or whoever have their own safe zones.  They can play how they want.  And for those who want to pew pew, go to low or null.

Granted, I don't think there should be a lot of safe zones, but just enough to give new players the chance to actually experience the game and have fun with it before saying 'fuck this game' and heading off to spend their money elsewhere.

Also, I'd rather have the 'carebears' happy.  They stay in the game and give CCP money.  CCP uses that money to make my gaming better.  The carebears then tell their friends, oh come play this game!  We get more people, more money, better game- it's a cycle, see?

Just my two cents.  Flame away.

Other bloggers:

• Blog Banter 32 by Corelin @ Haberdashers Run Amok
• EVE Online is Harsh - Live With It by Drackarn @ Sand, Cider and Spaceships
• Blog Banter 32 by Cle Demaari @ A Citizen in EVE
• Safe? by blastradius1 @ Blastrad Tales
• Consensual PvP? by Ned "CCP Manifest" Coker @ A Gaming Manifest
• Blog Banter 32 by evehermit @ Evehermit's Blog
• EVE is all about risk by TG3 @ Through Newb Eyes
• Blog Banter 32 by Harrigan Vonstudly @ Gun Turret Diplomacy
• Blog Banter 32 by Lukas Rox @ Torchwood Archives
• Blog Banter something or other and an update by TetraEtc @ Tetra's EVE Blog
• Life's not consensual by Logan Fyreite @ Eve Opportunist
• Without PvP, EVE will be nothing by Keyanu @ Muppetninjas
• Blog Banter 32 by A Scientist's Life in EVE
• Say Yes To Reasonable Protection by Kirith Kodachi @ Inner Sanctum of the Ninveah
• Your Ship is Out of Control by Rixx Javix @ EVEOGANDA
• Blog Banter 32 by Kaeda Maxwell
• What Makes EvE Real? by Kuan Yida @ Random Posts From Auga
• See No Evil by Azual Skoll @ The Altruist
• The Sandbox Argument by Seismic Stan @ Freebooted
• Blog Banter 32 by Marc Scaurus @ Malefactor
• Non-Consensual Combat Restrictions - Pass by Mabrick @ Mabrick's Mumblings
• A Load of Crap by GamerChick42
• For the Children by Sered of Sered's Lives
• Against Your Will by Truen1ght of ...Shall we not Revenge
• BB: Option 3 by Mike Azariah @ A Missioneer in EVE
• Who Are You.. Really? by Orakkus @ 2nd Anomaly From the Left

Entry 147: Meeting Lukka

"How did your meeting go?"

Shalee glanced sideways, unsurprised to see the Imperial Agent. He seemed to have a way of popping up out of the blue. He grinned at her as he settled against the railing that she'd been leaning on, watching the waves rolling across the shoreline.

"It was strange. Every interaction I've ever had with that man has ended poorly. Time after time he's acted as if he hated me...now all of a sudden he's actually nice to me? It makes no sense. And he wants me to actually trust him. I mean, there's trust then theres I'm-putting-my-life-in-your-hands trust. He says he can give me back most of my memories."

"He has a backup?"

"It's pretty current, I'd only be missing a couple of months of memories."

"So you'd remember everything but the most important thing you're after. You wouldn't know why you got involved with Tiger," he said thoughtfully.

She nodded.

"I wish I could help you. I honestly don't know what you were up to. I told you several times to stay away from him. He wasn't an official assignment, not from the Empire. However that doesn't mean anything really, you could have picked up the assignment from any number of people."

"Like Raphael Saint?"

Kathetel nodded. "You might have done some work for him. Or CVA even, Tiger was a huge thorn in their side at one time. There could have been any number of reasons you befriended him. You could have decided to do it on your own, for whatever reason. You have a habit of killing Sani Sabik, after all. Or...it could be what it seems. You could have actually fell in love with him...despite my warnings."

She shrugged, "Guess I'll never really know the whole truth."

He looked out at the sea, "Are you going to take Verone up on his offer?"

"I don't know. I have until the morning to decide. He seems genuine and everyone keeps telling me that I can trust him- well, Miko and his doctor, anyhow."

"You've trusted him in the past."

"That's what he said. But I don't remember that. I don't remember him, all I know is that he is a notorious crime lord, on the DED's most wanted, and that he has a strong hatred for Amarr. So yeah, not too eager to put my life in his hands."

Kathetel suggested, "You could always live as you are now."

Shalee made a face, "True. But then I'd always wonder. I'd always have this lingering doubt in the back of my mind about everyone. If I take him up on the offer, at least I'd know. Maybe not about Tiger but everyone else."

"True. So you've made up your mind?"

She sighed, "I guess I have. I have little choice otherwise, the only other current neural copy is in the hands of Jacobi...if that's even true. It could be a ruse. I wouldn't put it past him."

"He will be dealt with in time."

"Yeah. But until then..." She brushed a strand of hair from her face, "I'll trust the pirate. But...if I don't come back..."

"You will. One way or another, you will. And if this is a setup-which I highly doubt- then I'll have your jump clone activated. It's current, yeah?"

She nodded, "Yeah. And I'll have another scan before I leave. Apparently I'll be there for at least twenty four hours, the doctor says I'll have to stay put for a while."

"You're staying at the VETO headquarters? Does Tiger even know you're doing this?"

"No one does except you, Miko, Verone, and his doctor. No one from corp knows."

"How are they anyhow?"

"Busy. We've spent weeks moving out of Huola."

"How do you feel about that?" he asked.

"It's different. All I've ever known is the Bleaks and Devoid. Though it's only sixteen jumps away it feels as if it's on the far side of New Eden. But, orders are orders, and we have been tasked with heading a new front into Minmatar space. A part of me is excited about it, I guess," she admitted.

"About that..." he pulled small data chip and passed it to her. "The real reason you guys were assigned the Otosela front..."

"A new assignment?"

He nodded. "But don't activate it until you return from Veto. Just in case, don't want them knowing what's really going on."

"Alright," she said curiously as she slipped it into her pocket. "I'll wait."

"Good. See you in a couple of days."

***

The lights of the Huola space station dimmed along the corridor, simulating evening time. At the far end of the hall, a group of new Amarrian militia pilots rounded the corner, talking loudly and laughing, obviously in a good mood. Shalee assumed their patrol went well.

She nodded to them as they passed mid-corridor. One paused and lightly grabbed her by the arm, trying to get her attention, "Hey Commodore, be careful out there, I hear Lukka was seen warping in."

Another young pilot groaned as he heard the news, "Sansha balls, not him! He cost me half a bil in implants last time he was around."

Shalee quirked a tawny brow, "Lukka?"

"Yeah, don't you remember him? Terrorized the 24th for a couple of months, popping most anything that landed."

"Scum," muttered another.

"Oh yeah, I vaguely remember something about him. So he's back?"

"That's what intel says, anyhow. So be careful okay?

"Yeah, of course." She smiled to the bunch of them, "Actually I'm not on the roster tonight, got some things to take care of planet side, but I'll see you guys in a couple of days."

"Roger that. See you Commodore." He tossed her a lazy salute as he dashed up the hall to catch up with his friends.

Shalee neared the windows and crossed her arms, staring aimlessly out into space. Several more militia pilots were being pulled into docking range. She recognized a couple of ships and made her way to the station's public hangar's, hoping she'd run into First General, needing to pass on some information to him before she clone jumped into Veto's medical facilities.

Instead, she came face to face with the notorious Lukka, though she did not recognize him.

"Are you a new recruit?" she asked, eyeing him cautiously.

He laughed. "Nothing of the sort, Commodore Lianne." He said her name slowly, grinning. He propped up against the wall and folded his arms, eyeing her with a smirk.

"Well? What do you want?" she asked impatiently, almost unnerved by the way he was staring at her.

"I have something to tell you, however, I know you're not going to believe me." He continued to grin, as if it were all some big, amusing game to him.

She found him infuriating.

"I really don't have time for this. Say what you will, sir."

"Lukka," he said, correcting her.

"You're the man I just heard about? Great. Though I warn you, your little cowardly sniping tricks wont work inside the station."

He laughed, "Now now Seashell, is that any way to talk to the man who's come to save your life?"

"Don't call me Seashell," she said with the arrogance only a Holder's daughter could muster, her tone imperious and cold. 'You'll address me as befitting my station and rank, sir." She practically spit the word at him.

"You used to like it. In fact, you used to like a lot of things..." his tone insinuated much.

"Impossible."

"You really did have a penchant for the bad boys, you know. Too bad you've forgotten."

She rolled her eyes.

"There it is, that fiery little temper that everyone finds so irresistible." He pushed himself from the wall and cornered her, his massive arms coming up to trap her against the wall behind her. "That temper that gets you into oh-so-much trouble, young lady."

She twisted her face in anger as she jerked her knee up, aiming to shove it into his groin. He grabbed her thigh before it could make contact. "You know I like it when you're rough, sweetheart." He forced her leg down as he grabbed her wrists with one hand, capturing them above her head. "Are you prepared to listen now?"

She nodded, her blue eyes blazing with hot anger. "Yes."

"Good," he said as he released her hands.

"Get off of me!" she shoved at his chest.

He laughed, not budging, remaining mere inches from her. "Being a hero is quite exhausting, you know." He said as she shoved him again. "I thought you said you were going to listen."

"Go to hell." She balled her hand into a tight fist and slammed it against the side of his jaw.

"Goddammit." He scooped her up in a fluid move, tossing her lithe form across his shoulder. She screamed and wailed at his back. "We could have done this the easy way but would you listen? Noooo." He carried across the metallic walkway and through the door of his rented station's captain's quarters.

Once inside he threw her onto a sofa, "Don't you dare move," he said as he qued up the holographic screen in front of them.

Before her eyes, the Scope logo disappeared into black as a personal recording flashed into view.

Her eyes widened as she watched herself and Lukka roll across a black, satin covered bed. Naked.

His hand caressed her thigh, inching it's way up as he asked, "Ready for round two? She giggled in response and said, "And three, and four." Her mouth grazed his jawline. "And five," she whispered seductively.


She squeezed her eyes shut as she yelled, "Turn it off!"

He complied and the room faded into semi darkness.

"Fine. I get it, okay? We fucked."

"Such a crude little mouth you have on you, Seashell. Another thing I really loved."

She exhaled a frustrated breath. "What do you even want from me? Because you must know that I don't remember you, and I feel like if I ever meant anything at all to you, I would have seen you in these past few months...and since I don't even have a clue to who you are..."

The humor left his face and he simply stared at her for the longest of moments before saying, "I've seen you. You didn't know it but I've kept my eye on you from the distance, and I know that you went to see Ethan Verone last night and I know that your old self wouldn't do that. You two quit talking for a reason."

"What do you even know about him?"

"I know what you've told me in the past. I know he is someone that meant you harm once, and I know that you need to stay away from him."

She considered his words. "But he wants to help me now. He wants to give me my memories back."

"Yeah, but at what price? He threatened to kill you before, Shalee. So you have to ask yourself now, what's in it for him?"

Entry 146: The Offer

Ethan Verone sat behind his desk, his long legs kicked up on the corner of the glass surface as he watched the holo-display in front of himself. He smiled at the images displayed and tilted his head as the door opened.
Miko Hareka led Shalee inside.

Verone gestured to the seats opposite himself, his voice, quiet and deep, his huge frame just a silouhette against the backdrop of the rattlesnakes in the dark office. "Have a seat."

Shalee slid into the offered seat and crossed one tanned leg over the other. She folded her arms across her chest, her blue gaze locked on the pirate. "Thank you."

"How've you been?" Verone asked her as Miko sealed the door behind him and leaned against it.

Her brow quirked. "Since we've last spoke? Fine, I guess." She hesitated for a second then asked, "And yourself?"

"I'm always well, life is just like that for me."

"Of course."

"How's your memory coming along?"

"I've had a recent memory."

"Oh?"

"I think perhaps because I clone jumped, I'm not sure. Just a small memory, about Raphael Saint."

"Well, this is good news. I understand if it's something you can't share."

"It's nothing major really, I remembered that I started eating meat because he introduced me to it," she said.

"That's a good thing." He smiled. "I have an idea."

She relaxed as he smiled. "Hmm?"

"I've talked it over with the best cloning physician I know, my own personal medical consultant."

"And?"

He rested his feet down and leaned forward from out of the shadow, the light from the holo projector bathing his tanned face as piercing blue eyes looked across the desk to her. "He can fix you, if you want him to."

"Fix me how precisely?"

"Well, it's possible to give you your memory back,"  Verone said.  "The specifics are beyond my simple, meatheaded brain. Would you like to talk to the doc?"

She hesitated, "But to gain it I would lose my new life, correct?"

Verone shook his head, smiling. "No, you could retain what you've learned since. Its' actually beneficial for me if you do retain what you've learned since, actually. So, it helps us both."

"Beneficial how?"

"It'd give me peace of mind."

"Explain."

"Knowing that I helped you, and knowing you know, that I helped you."

"You said I wouldn't like what I found out,"  Shalee said.

"You wouldn't now. But, with restoration, you'd deal with it, and still have he knowlege that you have now. What you've learned since the accident. Maybe the doctor can explain it better?" He glanced down to her and smiled, noting the tanned thighs. "Your dress sense has changed, I approve, and it looks like you're getting a lot of sun. That'll be on the terrace?"

"I'm just not sure why I should trust you," she admitted, then glanced down at her bare legs, "Well it's not cold there. No snow to dress for."

Verone smiled warmly, "You trusted me with your life, before. And I trusted you with mine. You trusted me with your reputation too, and I did the same." He nodded over to Miko, "Miko, be a darling and call Toma for me?"

Miko Hareka laughed slightly and nodded, before heading out, "Sure thing, Eth."

"Toma?"

Miko sealed the door behind himself as he left.

"Yeah, my Doctor," Verone said. "He was the one who treated you here, when you had your accident. He took the scans, and the gentic backup."

Shalee glanced over her shoulder as Miko left, frowning as the door closed. She returned her gaze to Verone, "I don't understand why I was here."

"You don't have to be scared of being alone with me. If I wanted to hurt you, I'd have had ample opportunity to do it before now. I don't want to hurt you Shalee."

"I'm not afraid."

"As for your question, You were here because we were... good friends, before your accident. Although we'd become a bit estranged. The friendship became very rocky. Something I regret every day."

"You haven't even tried to be friends with me that I can remember," she said.

"I alienated you for your own protection. I didn't want a fresh mind to have my influence."

"Then how are you protecting me now, by offering a chance to remember?"

"Because you're not a fresh mind any more. You have experience, you've taken a perspective on the world, and you have the knowledge to choose."

"How do you mean? Because I remembered one thing? About Raphael?"

"As a blank canvas, so to speak, you didn't have that."

"Oh."

"You understand now?"

"Experience as a capsuleer, sure." she said.

"That accounts for a lot."

"I know."

"Good, then you've learned well."

A few minutes passed by in silence.  "I'm thinking."

"About what?" he asked.

"About what to do."

Dr Einmoch tapped on the door before heading inside. He made his way over to Ethan, nodding.

Verone smiled at Toma, before looking to Shalee, "This is Toma Einmoch. The man I trust with my life every second, of every day."

She glanced up to the doctor, "Hello."

Einmoch offered a perfectly manicured hand to her, smiling, "We've met many times before, however, you won't remember. It's a pleasure to see you again, Shalee."

She shook his hand, "Oh. I see."

"Good to see you again, I guess."

The doctor chuckled.

Verone nodded then turned his attention back to her, "You always were a stubborn one, Shalee. You always had that fire about you, some of our talks have been harsh, and for that I'm sorry."

"All of our talks have been harsh except this one," she countered. "So you can see why I'm reluctant to take you at your word?"

"Then, don't take my word. Take Toma's. Unlike me, he's not in the business of taking life, he tries to save and preserve it."

"He works for you."

Verone nodded, "That he does."

"We can help you Shalee, should you allow us," Einmoch said.

"How does it work? How do you combine both sets of memories?"

Dr Einmoch took a seat in the spare beside her, and opened his palm. A soft light expanded from the centre of it, producing a holo that hovered above his smooth hand. He smiled as the image took the form of a human brain, a timeline above it. It then shrank and turned into two brains, one red, one blue. "We currently have two sets of memories, yes? We use red and blue, to denote them. seen here."

She nodded, "Alright."

"Firstly, we take you, in your present form, and run a soft scan, neural backup of you. This will preserve your current memories. From the time you awoken after the accident, until now." The blue holo of the brain turned white with the blue turning into a pulsing waveform above it. "The second set of memories are in storage, that we have."

Einmoch gestured to the flashing red holo, "We will create a clone for you here. Complete with your original memories, okay? As seen here..." A red bar appeared above it, a pulsing waveform that took the form of a timeline, "This you will use as a jumpclone... okay?"

She nodded.

"Your current memories, that you hold in your head right now, when you jump, will be parsed over, through the jumpcloning process, like so." He flicked his index finger, the two holos merged together, the brains overlapped each other, the timelines doing the same.

"You make it sound so simple."

Einmoch nodded as the brain image turned purple with the timelines doing the same, a slight grey gap between the two bands of memories. "What will happen, when we prepare the clone correctly is this. Your original memories will be retained, since there is no data to overwrite them, in long term memory."

"We ensure this by scripting the cloning sequence and the hardware not to overwrite the current state of any active neurons in the entorhinal cortex, and allow only the new data to be processed by the hippocampus. What will happen, is you will awaken with both sets of memories, you will be your old self, but you will have all the knowledge and experience you have absorbed since, even the memory of this conversation, right up until the point you jump clone. There will be a gap, between the neural scan at our facilities, and your cloning accident. That, we have no data for. To you, it will just seem like an area of memory you can't recall. A coma, effectively, like a long sleep."
"How much time is there in between do you think?"

"When was your accident?"

"Months ago. I don't recall the exact day."

"Our scan runs up until June 11th, 113. You'll have every memory up until then, then a gap, and every memory since the accident. You will know who you were, and who you are now."

"So when can we do this? How long will it take? Are there any dangers?"

"It's low risk. We could finalise a clone from a blank within twenty-four hours, then all you would have to do, is jump. I've uh, tested it. On Ethan's request."

"What do you mean by that?"

Verone glanced at the rattlesnakes out through the windows, disconnecting himself from the conversation.

Dr Einmoch said, "We ran trials, to see if the process would work. The first was a failure. We ran a further fifty seven, all were sucessful, after a minor tweak."

Shalee hesitated for a moment, then took a long breath and exhaled before saying, "Very well then. Twenty-four hours it is. Do I have to do anything to prepare?"

Einmoch shook his head, and smiled warmly, "No, just have faith. And if you'd like to see proof of the process, just look at Mr Hareka."

"Mr Hareka has lost his memories at some point too?" she asked.

"No, he volunteered to be mentally split, and re-assembled." The doctor said. "Ethan pays... extremely well."

Verone smiled.

Shalee relaxed into her chair. "I see." She looked to Ethan as he smiled. "I hope this isn't some sort of trickery but I have little choice but to trust you. I don't have any other options that I would even consider."

"I'll prepare for tomorrow, and leave you to talk." Einmoch stood and flicked his hand a little to make the holo vanish, before heading for the door. "There is one more thing, Shalee."

"Yes?"

"Make provisions not to pilot, for twenty-four hours after the clone jump. It's imperative that you stay rested and out of harm's way. Do you understand? In fact, I may insist on you staying with us for twenty-four hours after the transfer, depending on how it goes."

She nodded. "I guess they can spare me for twenty four hours."

"Excellent. Then I will see you tomorrow, when you awaken here." He smiled as he left, closing the door behind himself.

Blog Banter 31: Why EvE Wins

Blog Banter 31: EVE Online Community Review

Welcome to the thirty-first EVE Blog Banter, a community conversation between anyone and everyone with an interest in discussing EVE Online. For more information on how this works, check out this link or for details of this edition's topic, read on.

As any games journalist would probably tell you, a true and complete review of a Massively Multiplayer Online game is impossible. MMOs are vast, forever evolving entities with too much content for a single reviewer to produce a fair and accurate review. However, a collection of dedicated bloggers and EVE players (past and present) with a wide range of experience in various aspects of the game might be able to pull it off.

This special 'End of Year' Blog Banter edition aims to be a crowd-sourced game review. Using your gaming knowledge and experience, join the community in writing a fair and qualified review of EVE Online: Crucible. This can be presented in any manner of your choosing, but will ideally include some kind of scoring system. 

With each Blog Banter participant reviewing the areas of EVE Online in which they specialise, the result should be a Metacritic-esque and accurate review by the people who know best. 

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There are many reasons why EvE Online is simply the best MMO there is, and I'm sure there will be a lot of responses to this blog banter describing the most obvious things: one server, learning skills via time instead of grind, and well, it's spaceships.

But the thing that keeps me most interested is the roleplay.  

I have little experience with other games, having only really played World of Warcraft before my EvE addiction, so I'll compare the two in regards to RP.  

Who RPs?

Anyone who plays EvE is essentially an rper, whether they realize it or not.  If you log into the game, you're pretending to be a space pilot.  You choose the 'story' of your character- a pirate, scammer, industrial, etc.  That is roleplay.  

So everyone who plays an MMO is an RPer to a degree.

But, some are better than others.  It takes two things to be an online rper: 1. something to write about and 2. someone to write it.

On EvE you have more unique experiences to write about because it's a sandbox instead of game-of-grind.  What's a more interesting read?  A story about yet another elf dancing on a mailbox after a long day of picking flowers, or the one guy who spent nearly a year infiltrating a corp to steal loot worth thousands of real life dollars?

So just for that reason alone, EvE is superior to WoW.

World of War Craft: 0

EvE Online: 10 (EvE wins!)

What do you RP?

What happens in RP?  Everything that happens on EVE is rp essentially.  EvE Online is one massive, interactive story.  Every pilot I come across can affect my character's story.  That is the best part about EvE, is that one single person can change the entire game.

With WoW, your character starts off on a series of quest, and you grind and grind til you get to the top level, then grind some more for the top gear.  It's the same boring story for everyone.  "Oh he wants you to go kill ten kobolds and bring back some candles?  Hey wait...he told me to do the same thing!"  Your character isn't unique and you have no real choices for how the overall story goes.

But in EvE, the players are the story.

World of War Craft: 0

EvE Online: 10 (EvE wins!)

Where do you RP?

Roleplay on World of Warcraft was difficult to find.  They had several realms that claimed to be rp but usually those servers were just a bunch of kids who had no idea what rp even was.

On EvE, it's relatively easy to find even if you know nothing about the game.  A new player can check the EvE Online forums and find a whole section dedicated to in-character.  (The Intergalatic Summit, aka IGS and EVE Fiction)  In game, there are many channels dedicated solely to rp.

It doesn't stop there.  There are many blogs, websites, and podcasts that are dedicated to RP.

World of War Craft:0

EvE Online: 10 (EvE wins!)

When do you RP?

It happens around the clock.  With players form all over the world, there is always someone around to roleplay with usually.

On WoW, servers are sorted by countries or something, so that means there are a lot of slow times on WoW, when everyone is asleep, or off at work, yada yada.

World of War Craft: 0

EvE Online: 10 (EvE wins!)

Why do you RP?

Why should you immerse yourself into the story of your toon?  Well why not?  It adds another level to the game.  RP can give you motivation and direction.  It makes what you do that much more meaningful.  As an Amarr Militia pilot, plexing can be rather dull but I do it, not because I have nothing better to do, but because it would matter to my character to defend Amarrian territority (and hey I'm hoping to get a little pvp out of it too).

RP can open up doors.  I have met so many interesting people in the game because I am a roleplayer.

Still not convinced?  I got a free year of EvE for my RP blog and won half a billion in an EvE writing contest.

There are no benefits to rping on WoW that I know of.

World of War Craft: 0

EvE Online: 10 (EvE wins!)

How do you RP?

Just play the game.  If you're in the sandbox, you're roleplaying.

But if you want to take it deeper, if you want to explore your character's motivations and emotions, then you can always join one of the RP channels and interact with other people.  If you don't know what channels to join, check here for a full list.  Also, join the BackStage forums, because they are awesome too.

Or, you can write a story and blog it.  There are massive amounts of rp blogs out there all telling the story of New Eden.

When I was on WoW it was difficult to get started in it because there were no guilds and websites there to help you out.  (that I knew of anyhow)

World of War Craft: 0

EvE Online: 10 (EvE wins!)

So there you have it folks.  RP on EvE is far superior, so if you're playing WoW, quit and rp on EvE... (I might be a little bit biased :))

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• The Rollercoaster Thrill Ride that is Eve Online, with Cookies, Review by Rixx Javix @ EVEOGANDA
• The Entire Wormhole That Eve Is by Harrigan Vonstudly @ Gun Turret Diplomacy
• EVE Online Community Review by Drackarn @ Sand, Cider and Spaceships
• EVE is what the player makes of it by tgl3 @ Through Newb Eyes